How does one top a pencil skirt - made out of real pencils?

As the rain beats a steady, rhythmic pattern on the London pavements, the last thing one expects to see is a flame haired damsel riding a bicycle, in platforms even Naomi Campbell would shy away from, a black ring around one eye and a t-shirt that blares the words CLIMATE CHANGE or something to those odds. But if you had been in St. Pancras last night that isn't far from the image you would have seen, for it was the holy of all holies....Vivienne Westwood's SS14 collection. As a pale, red headed beauty walks onto the catwalk, hair covering her eyes, you wouldn't be surprised if it was Grace Coddington or Viv herself from 30 years ago. The shape starts to dance, moving around in an almost animalistic manner, swaying to the silent music....until she abruptly stops, lifts her head up and you realise it is the iconic, Lily Cole. Of course you understand now; the two women are trying to save the world one logo emblazoned tee at a time. The show that follows is quick and dirty - the way any Vivienne Westwood show should be. It is fashion in its purest form - wearable but with that elegant mix of eccentricity. As if the mad hatter were alive and well and designing for Ms Westwood himself. And the only thing better than that? My housemate was sat next to Anna Kendrick....Shawty get daaaahhhhhhn.


Vivienne Westwood Red Label - Vogue.co.uk

Now, some may say I am biased, but LFW is by far my favourite - Mary Katrantzou, Christopher Kane, Vivienne Westwood, Jonathan Saunders, Roksanda Illincic, Erdem, Marios Schwab....need I go on? Here are some of my fav pieces so far:

Peter Pilotto (Vogue.co.uk) - The AW13 collection was so spectacular I was considering selling a kidney to get even a tiny piece of it. Prints. That is the word I associate with PP - eye watering, hallucinogenic, utterly perfect prints. And what is this? Yes he has not only paired the on trend kaleidoscope print with a bell shaped skirt, but has made the entire ensemble pastel coloured. Incroyable.



Burberry Prorsum (Vogue.co.uk) - This is the show to be seen at. It may have gone through that strange chav phase, but now, you are only truly in fashion if you are watching the new collections strut down that runway - thank goodness they stream these things live now heh!! Pastels, sheers, lace, female boss suiting and underwear as outerwear was championed on the catwalks this season. Some of the outfits saw all of these things at once, proving the only way is Burberry. I wonder if they vajazzle??



Roksanda Illincic (Vogue.co.uk) - Taking a 50s housewife skirt and toughening it up is no mean feat. A Grease like flavour could be seen throughout the collection with high waisted, full skirts being worn with pretty tops and bows in their hair. Boxy shapes and monochrome brogues brought these pieces firmly into the modern day however, making an irresistible combination of...well... Danny and Sandy.



Jonathan Saunders (Vogue.co.uk) - To some, a trip to your Dad's wardrobe in the 70s, to others the perfect combination of the SS14 trends in separates. Block colours, knee length shorts, silks, boxy cropped jackets, sheer shirts...this man has thought of everything. But then again I supposed that's why he is one of the most recent British Fashion Council/Vogue Fashion Fund winners - keep an eye on this maverick, I believe the best is yet to come.



Mary Katrantzou (Vogue.co.uk) - If you haven't seen her pencil skirt (literally made with a pencil print) then you haven't lived. You know how Michael McIntyre is so funny because he tells us stuff about our lives we already know? Observational humour if you will. Well Mary does the same thing but with prints. A thousand mirror print flowers on a skin tight silk dress? Lipsticks chasing down the side of a bell shaped ensemble? It is real life....with a slightly less real price tag. My forever obsession - Brogue dress, mmmmmm.



And on that note I suppose I have to leave you with the Mary Katrantzou pencil skirt, which started out on the catwalk as this (telegraph.co.uk) .... yes they are real pencils...



And was translated into this (polyvore.com)...


See you tomorrow for more LFW fun!

NYFW sees pastels, sportswear and...penguin?

It's Sunday, you are feeling a little worse for wear after last night and you just found your housemates false eyelash stuck to the bottom of the glass you are drinking from. Life is looking a little less razzle dazzle and a little more, 'isn't it misleading that Monday rhymes with fun-day'. So with the final few hours of your weekend slipping away, I bring you a few more trends that have graced the New York Fashion Week catwalks over the last couple of days. And just remember, Vicky Beckham hasn't eaten since 1992, so your life could be worse.

Sporty Tailored Separates: We are well into NYFW and so all of the big names have come out of their cotton strewn labs to bring you the crème de la crème of the new season's trends. One such artiste being the oh so coveted Alexander Wang. The man is next to Celine in making the most perfectly tailored/draped/cinched/sculpted separates for women and this collection did not fail to impress. In a twist on both the classic tailoring and the laidback sportswear, the two have been combined to make a new office wear trend which will have even the most uppity bosses taking you seriously. Well as serious as one's boss can take you when you are wearing a crop-top shirt and the equivalent of culottes....in fashion that is pretty damn serious.



Sheer Delight: I have made it very VERY clear to my lovely mother that there are only two designers I want adorning my body on my wedding day  - either Vera Wang or Monique Lhuillier. Monique understands that underneath it all, most of us women just want to be a princess. We want the frothy dresses, the smattering of crystals, the layers of lace (more royal princess than gypsy wedding...) and as is a HUGE trend for SS14, the soft feel of a sheer veil covering our bodies. Take a leaf out of her book, cover everything that needs to be covered and let the rest peek through a thin translucent fabric. Sheer beauty.



Pastel Perfection: Quelle surprise I hear you cry, pastels are in for SS14. Well yes, this is perhaps not ground breaking, but it is one of the easiest trends to wear and so pretty much deserves its crown as queen of the obvious. Prabal Gurung has created a line of the most spectacular suits, cocktail dresses and separates in divine shades of lavender, mint and bubble gum pink. Get a perfectly tailored suit in one pastel colour to make the boys realise you are sweet but still the boss.



Stripes: I mean who doesn't love a pinstripe suit on a woman right?! Ok, no-one....well no-one until now. Who said you couldn't wear two different stripes in one outfit? Well certainly not Altuzarra who has created a collection of striped separates that look like they may have been created from one of your Dad's old pyjama shirts, but surprisingly are some of the most flattering pieces on the catwalk. With vertical stripes to lengthen the body and a perfectly cut shirt, tucked into a skirt which shows the sexiest slice of thigh, the only thing you need to worry about is whether or not someone will mistake you for a tube map.



Monochrome: As always one of the most anticipated collections was that of Victoria Beckham - is it really true this sugary pop-let is turning her talents to impeccable fashion designing? Well yes it is. In one of her most grown up yet, the SS14 collection sees angular shapes, sheer panels and sports-luxe additions. Very un-VickyB. Generally I thought it was magical, all but a few cocktail dresses which weren't to my taste, but as the pro-ballers always do, she has managed to nail a one of the biggest trends - monochrome. Add a touch of white to your black outfit and make sure you visually pop in the crowd. So obsessed with the fact she layered the colours on top of each other instead of building them into one garment. Who knew that Penguin from Batman would turn out to be the most fashionable villain of them all?



And with that I will leave you with style and substance - Vivienne Westwood at her best during the SS13 FW shows....saving the planet and wearing face paint.

Fashion... Just for a BRIT of a change...

Hi!!

So what have you all decided to give up for lent? I am sat here eating Twirl bites and watching Les Miserable clips on Youtube, so you can clearly see I have given up none of my favourite things. And I can't give up fashion because it will interfere with my work - sooo... What I would like to give up is going to the Job Centre - I went today to see about backdating this whole Job Seeker's Allowance situation. Henry VIII was still there - see previous post for explanation - and he greats me with "first claim - are you excited" to which I give obligatory but forced laugh - he then asks me again as though answering this question is imperative to my claim. I said no. What? Pancakes and lies don't mix well. He then said "are you nervous... because you should be" and then laughed to himself. Unless we have slipped into a parallel universe where instead of being in the Job Centre I am actually in a pub waiting to go on a date with you, then no I am not nervous. Even if I was in said parallel universe, nervous wouldn't be the correct word...nauseated would be. Anyway, all in all was a pretty pointless experience - will let you know if I get anything from it.

BUT!! I cannot be down in the mouth because last night was the BRITS!!! Firstly we just need to deal with the fact that this Adele quitting for five years thing seems to actually be true seeing as when she picked up her award for best album she said "bye, see you all next time round I guess!" to which the crowd naturally booed. Please do not go Adele, you are our broken heart fixer. How else are we going to explain when we sometimes feel the need to have a little cry in the car, then stop next to the boy we used to date and have to explain - "Just listening to 'Someone Like You'" which they then think is about them and decide to ask no more questions??

Right - the Brits is tooooooo important to squish into a little post - so I am postponing L until tomorrow. Please send all complaints about this to the Job Centre. Anyway, lets break this fashion extravaganza down into people and trends (all images lovingly borrowed from The Guardian unless otherwise stated http://www.guardian.co.uk/fashion/gallery/2012/feb/22/brit-awards-red-carpet-arrivals):

Jessica Rabbit - Lana Del
Rey

RED!! Besides walking on the red carpet, quite a few of the lovelies were wearing it. I am still unsure what I am feeling about the red sheer/embroidered gown Jessie J was wearing. I can't decide if it is her or the dress I am rebelling against. With the hair and the eyes it was all just a little Christina Aguilera in the Lady Marmalade video.... Lana Del Rey did however look like the real life version of Jessica Rabbit in a stunning but simple red Vivienne Westwood gown. With her hair that colour, just flowing simply and with her uhum full lips, well she is a female force to be reckoned with. Christina Perri did the same thing as Jessie with sheer and embroidery/sequin cover ups - I like Jessie's more - I know I even surprised myself with that. Jessie's looks better made and classier, Christina's looks kind of cheap... I really liked that Pixie Lott had gone for a classic black number and paired it with bright red accessories - another twist to the all red look. The look was perhaps a little too old for her though? She looked beautiful, but maybe could have gone with something more youthful and fun.

Dazzling - Rihanna

Highly/unusually embellished - Rihanna: girl where have you been!! I really liked what she was wearing last night - a heavily beaded long dress - not too dissimilar in cut to the one she wore to the Grammys (which I wasn't keen on because it was rather plain/cheap looking). She look striking in the dress which matched her skin tone...and her shoes! Get it girl. If this is what her Giorgio Armani capsule collection is going to be like I have judged her too soon (this dress is Givenchy - not from her collection). Also Alexandra Burke was wearing a creation embellished with a wooden neckline, which is SO on trend. Get wood in any part of your ensemble - bag, heel, jewellery or clothing if you can. So cute, so sustainable. Nicole Scherzinger (the only Pussycat Doll we remember according to James Corden) also pulled out all the trend stops with a pastel (YES!), lemon (YES!!), highly embellished (YES!!!) strapless dress - damn girl.

Woman in Black - Adele

I was disappointed with Kylie's dress - I thought it was boring and rather prom looking - royal blue strapless YSL dress. And, however much I LOVE Adele and everything about her - I wish she would try something that wasn't a long black dress. Don't get me wrong she looked absolutely STUNNING!! Maybe when she pops back in a few years she will have met Mary Katrantzou...

Someone needs to explain to me how Florence is the only woman in the world who thinks she can wear pale colours and not look dead. Maybe it is just because she always goes with Chanel or (like last night) Alexander McQueen creations. I <3 your designer choice sweet girl, but not the colours - get some vibrant red or emerald green on you and watch everyone hate you for being so fabulous.

A Little Too Mixed Up

You will either agree with me or hate me for this next statement - I was SEVERELY disappointed with Little Mix - their outfits did not co-ordinate in anyway and the colours clashed - not in a cute edgy way either. There were too many trends - snakeskin, pastels, tweed, clunky shoes - but they were not done right. Just choose one or two and make sure you focus on those... I know they are new, so I will let them off, but this time next year I want to see a HUGE improvement - got it!!!

Work It Ed

I thought the boys all looked cute - Tinie Tempah always cracks me up. All the boys but Plan B I should say - who to be honest seemed kind of out of it - and I think was wearing a suit he had worn before....ewwww. I LOVED that Ed Sheeran sang in a t-shirt and jeans but then came on in a 70s looking prom suit. He really is just the love of my life. The One Direction boys looked nothing if not dapper - maybe they can speak to Little Mix about co-ordination.

CHER-ing my sequins with...

...Louie Spence

Luckily stars were all for eco-friendly clothing this award show and Cher Lloyd and Louis Spence made sure nothing was wasted when they created their outfits. Share a bolt of fabric, save the world. How about use your own fabric, save the world from a terrible outfit... Worst dressed by far (bar the foxy Louboutin spiked shoes Cher is wearing) [Cher image from The Sun online and Louis Spence from holymoly.com]




Hope you all enjoyed the Brits as much as I did. Now to think about whether I should give up carbs for lent....hmmm do I enjoy pasta or body con more...on that note I think I better pop to Jane's Pantry before it closes. Ciao.
Becky xx

We all scream for....a badly furnished apartment in ghetto central

Afternoon,

In good news I am even more stressed than yesterday about the apartment hunt in London. It seems if you call them they will grill you about every penny you have and then still wont offer you a viewing anytime this Millenia. No, it's fine, I would love to move in at the beginning of April...2013. I am going to have to make some serious life choices this weekend - I am going to need to buy more Poptarts.

I must apologise to those of you that read my blog yesterday and saw a rather large (but fabulous Haute Hippie) skirt covering half my title. I have no idea how it got there, but after my mother had text me saying "it's time to lift your skirt love" I thought I must remove it or be subjected to other cringey jokes. So even though I removed my skirt yesterday, I was still unable to find an apartment in even the most crappy areas of London - obviously 'Diary of a London Call Girl' is not so true to life after all.

The highlight of my day was watching "Steps - The Reunion" with my bestie Becky (we have the same name, the same road, the same teeth....). It was all well and good when you wanted to be Claire - who turned out to be the Yoko to H's John Lennon - and how much we all loved H - whose real name is Ian and is as straight as a Pete Doherty's walk in front of a policeman after a night out; but what happens now they are trying to reunite 10 years on? The programme was a 4 parter that originally aired in August 2011 about why the band split. It turns out they hated each other. 10 years on my bfffff and I couldn't believe how hurt we were that Lee and H weren't actually the 'bros' to Lisa, Faye and Claire's 'ho's'. Devestated. I think the real victim of the last 10 years is....PVC. No band since has managed to make PVC so integral to their everyday wardrobe. We all remember the little squeaky blue numbers of 'Deeper Shade of Blue' and those long red coats for .... well I have no idea, but we all remember. The sale of talcum powder must have rapidly declined now that we have no reason to wear a yellow PVC jump suit...and that was just for the boys. Oh well, if we can't wear that, we will listen to 'It's The Way You Make Me Feel' and feast over these beauties...

I



Mulberry S/S 12 Campaign
http://www.mulberry.com/#/thisseason/thecampaign/

Fashion Trend: Ice cream colours! Delish to say the least. Louis Vuitton and Mulnberry have both gone as far as to add ice cream props into their new collections. Take a look at any of the scrummy LV adverts in Vogue/Harper's and see that in the fashion world food is rarely for eating. A good many designers showcased pastels in a bid to transform models into 60s beauties - but there is not a twinset and pearls in sight. Think high heels in mint, housewife dresses in Pepto pink and shapely suits in sherbert lemon. This trend is so perfect for those of us trying to save for an apartment...because you literally just have to colour block with pastels!! So grab your pair of lemon denims, throw on a peach shirt and grab a Nobbly Bobbly - it's going to be a HOT summer!!

Ingrid Dot Print Dress £520
http://www.viviennewestwood.co.uk/shop/w
omenswear/dresses/ingrid-dots-print-dress-13219/

Fashion Item: Ingrid Dots Print Dress - Vivienne Westwood. If you know me you know I LOVE polka dots. I would paint them on my face if I could. I just think they are feminine and dainty...like me!! Ok, we are too far into our friendship for me to start telling porkies, but I do LOVE this dress. It is classic and the shape is so flattering. The muted colours could definitely fit into the ice cream trend as well. This dress is so worth giving up real dessert for...

Scarlett $180
http://ivankatrumpfootwear.com/index
.php/collections/weekend/scarlett.html

Store or Label: Ivanka Trump Footwear http://ivankatrumpfootwear.com/index.php/profile/news. I suppose as with every celebrity turned designer it depends what you think of the person. I have always had a strange fascination with her. She has a HUGE range of shoes on her website and they are very reasonably priced - no more than a pair of Kurt Geigers for sure. She has something for every occasion from wedding to weekend. It is worth a look at least - you deserve a bit of me time after all that dessert you've given up.

Celebrity or Designer: Isabel Marant - French chic really can't come in any other box. She has something to suit everyone because so many trends are covered. Pleats, fashionable sportswear, boy chic, prints, denim; you want it, she has it. If you are feeling a certain je ne sais quoi, she will surely sais quoi it is you want. She isn't afraid to use colour, she isn't afraid to mix prints and there was a host of unusual fabric in her S/S collection. Tres bien.

All this typing has made me hungry. Anyone for pancakes? Extra ice cream.
Becky xx