Wednesday 16 May 2012

For those of you who always ask.

Today is going to be a slightly different post than normal...for all of you saying "different because you have actually written one?"...well touche to you pussycats. But no, it will be different because it is not directly about fashion, or jobs, or London. It is about America.

For those of you who don't know, I went to university in Saint Paul, Minnesota; a state large enough to fit the entirety of England in...and a good deal more. In just 10 days time it will be one whole year since I graduated from Saint Catherine University. For those of you who know me, it perhaps will be as surprising to you as it is to me that this long time has passed. Especially if you are one of the wonderful people I have left behind in MN. You might now be wondering why I am writing this. Basically, the reason is, because I never have. I have been literally inundated with "what was it like", "who did you meet", "do you eat donuts for breakfast" and all other manner of questions, which I have always answered with "amazing", "so many wonderful people" and "no, get a grip". I know for many of you who have been on the end of these questions, you wonder why I give such short and non informational answers. The truth I guess will be written here. Everything you have ever wanted to know. So for those of you who tell me you want to go to uni in America or for those of you who just (even after a year) ask, this is for you... As with all good stories I will start with the bad.

America was the most wonderful experience of my life, everyday was a blessing, every friendship a lifeline and every class an inspiration. Flowers and hugs and love all round? Not quite. It was also the most heart breaking time of my life, filled with so much stress, worry and confusion that I could easily have been having a three year breakdown. Please do not get me wrong, I would not give even one single day back of my American life, but I want all of you to realise - especially those of you who want to go there yourself - that it was and will likely be the hardest thing I ever did.

 - How much do you love your parents? Your best friend? Your boyfriend? Your cat? A lot?? Well I loved or cared for a variation of each of these things a ridiculous amount. Now imagine yourself going to uni. You are sad, you will miss them, but if you want to Cardiff, Brighton or even Edinburgh are not so far that you cant come home. I was 9 hours away....by plane. Then 3 by car when off the plane. If I felt unwell, if I felt sad or if I just wanted to hug my family - not happening. 4 months is a LONG time to not see anyone you know or love. My whole life was misplaced in the space of a day and I knew I wouldnt get it back for 4 months; perhaps even properly for 3 years. The first night I was there I cried for a long time and then continued to cry for many more weeks... secretly of course because I had a room-mate. Those first three months I was adamant I had made a mistake and would return; return to somethings that I ended up losing because of being away for 3 years. Things I still miss.

 - During my three years I fell out with pretty much all of my English friends at least once. It is hard to be so close with people, move away and then feel they dont understand you or they feel you dont understand them. There were points in my life where I had two sets of friends (UK/USA) and felt more lonely than if I had none. What you have to understand is I was living 2 completely separate lives which NEVER crossed. So when I returned to either one after being in the other, I felt fractured, disjointed. Also, generally American humour is not like ours so I didnt laugh - really laugh - for a very long time. That didnt help things.

 - Also between my parents they spent the equivalent of buying a small house in England over the three year period on my American experience - not rent, BUY. For someone like me, that stressed me out. It also made me angry at students in this country who were spending 1/10th of what we were and were complaining. I got no loan in this country or America - not because my parents were rich, but because England had no reason to help me once I left and neither did America as a non-citizen. I am NOT complaining as it was MY choice to go to the U.S but im just saying, it wasnt cheap... Do not get me wrong, all of my friends went to uni in England so I am not being rude about the costs of this country, I understand it is hard, but perhaps it shows why part of the time I was distant from them. We didnt understand each other.

 - Minnesota could get to 40 below...in the day. And did once. I was someone who rarely got sick. I got VERY sick in MN. Every year. Food poisoning 3 times. Glandular fever once. In March 2011 I got pneumonia, an ear infection and a sinus infection in one go. Hands up those of you who hated being around me then. Sarah Walstrom im looking at you... Haha!

 - You have to take math, science, english, a language, IT, PE!!!! and a whole range of other stuff. Stuff you were sure you had found your way out of in highschool, stuff you used to have nightmares about....oh thats right, it comes back and bites you in the butt... And it expects you to get a good grade while its biting you. Dont be thinking American uni is all tanned hormone filled football players and their cheerleaders. Because if you spend too much time thinking about that, you wont have time to study for maths.

 - I got so stressed on a monthly basis I would cry and tell everyone I was going home. This didnt happen luckily. Unfortunately I did get little sleep and was moody a lot. I thank all the room-mates over the years for putting up with me. During my worst stress period I cried in a professor's office, told her she expected too much of me, threw some stuff and then Alex had to go apologise. Whats life without a little drama heh?

Perhaps I should stop with the sad things now, although I could go on for longer. Instead I will share the good, of which there were also many.

HAPPY THINGS YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY HAND HOLD PARADE!!!

Every single day I hurt because of how much I miss America. My American life. My American family. This doesnt sound happy, but it shows how much I eventually loved it. Here are the reasons why:

The Barnards - Tom, Kath, Andy and Alex (ohhhhhh Alex). Have you ever had a friend you would laugh so hard with you thought you had broken a rib? Cried so much in front of they thought you had broken tear ducts? Told the most private and ridiculous things to? Held hands with? Did yoga with? Sang with? Danced with? Ate quinoa with? And loved more than a private plane on the way to the Hamptons? Well I do - her name is Alex and the above things happened on a daily basis. I truly believe people have soul mates and they arent necessarily the people you will marry, date, end up with. Alex HAS to be mine. There is no other explanation for the ridiculous way we lived our lives, laughing, fighting and eating bagles. I was lucky enough that Alex shared her family with me. A family I have no qualms in now calling my own. I love her parents like I love my own. They fed me dinner, took me on holidays, looked after me during illness, sadness or when I was lonely, included me in everything ... and introduced me to Vince Vaughn. You know, parent stuff. They are people I will expect to be at my wedding. People I will miss more on their birthdays. People I often just wish I was around. They are lifetimers in the Becky show...sorry guys. I love you all more than Andy loves candy. That's a stupid amount. I wouldnt have survived America or turned out the way I did without you guys. You are a special family. My family! Thank you!!
Sometimes Alex was a Ronson and I was a Lohan, what of it?

Me and Alex

Kathy & Jim, Ariana and their family - I have no doubt I would be a lot skinnier and have seen less movies if I didnt know these guys. Family friends since birth, Becky feeders for life. I wouldnt have survived my first four months without them.... and perhaps the 19 million illnesses after that. You are truly amazing people and I miss you and your house and your kindness. I love you all!

The food - Most of you are laughing because you know I am seriously addicted to food - yes Alex everything but cheese, water, nuts, wine, pickles..... But have you ever eaten Buffalo Wild Wings whilst watching a football game on a big screen? Eaten a cinnamon bun at midnight in Perkins with your room-mate who is having life troubles? Watched a Korean girl eat noodles in her sleep - oh Sohee we love you. My life is dictated and remembered through food. The first time I really felt part of the Barnard family - eating with them at the friends and family opening of La Grassa. Eating bagels with Alex. Turkey dinners with Chelsea. Pizza with Becky. Life shouldnt be about dieting. It should be about drinking Mountain Dew and eating puppy chow until you want to vom.

My degree - you were worth the several solid months of crying, the late nights, the early starts, the MOUNTAIN of papers - at least one 15-30 page paper per class per semester with at least 4-5 classes a semester with a semester lasting 4 months...work. it. out. When I walked across the stage, heard my friends whoop and knew my Dad was there - lets just say it was worth it.

Cleanses - If you were involved in these I am SORRY that I put you all through that. You will be glad to know I still inflict this on the English folk. My favourite ever line from Anu in front of class "Becky have you lost weight??" Me: "Yes" Friend: "She is only eating carrots" Anu: "Come on now...tell the class what sort of carrots".

New words - I now say pants instead of trousers, SKEDule instead of schedule, school instead of uni and other fun things. Deal with it. At least I havent told you I think in an American accent....oops.

Memories - I will never forget watching Alex dance to Dr Suess. I will never forget watching Sohee finish a family bucket of chicken after a chinese meal. I will never forget Katwalk. I will never forget Vegas. I will never forget the fights. I will never forget the love. I will NEVER forget my friends turning up to a surprise party thrown for me by Alex. I will cherish all of those memories forever.

Friends - Without you I would have packed up my stuff and been another college drop out. You are all insane but I wouldnt have you any other way. The room-mates, the shopping friends, the HNRLP. The friends I ate with, drank with, danced with. All of you I laughed with and most likely cried with. You are a wonderful set of human beings and I am proud to be your friends!


Girls
Friendship at its finest - on my birthday with a heavily pregnant Chels and crew.
So there is just 1/100th of the things I felt during my time there. I have perhaps never explained to you, because I couldnt. If you werent there you cant understand. I now feel like half of me is missing and im not sure how to get it back. All I know is that I would take the America risk 100 times over and still come out smiling with a belly full of love....and BDubs...

xxx

Monday 7 May 2012

Tell Someone You Love Them

Hello,

A few of my friends have been asking me about dresses lately - what to buy and from where. So here are what I see as some of the top dress trends. All you need to do is find a lovely boy who is willing to take you out in one! Enjoy.

THE PEPLUM DRESS:

JAMTHUN - Zip detail dress
Ted Baker £159
Peplums are SO flattering. As I have said before, they hide lumps and bumps if you have any, but also create an hourglass shape if you don't have one... Kate Middleton was just spotted wearing one to the African Cats premier she attended with Prince William. Endorsed by the most beautiful woman in Britain... hanging in every single one of our wardrobes.


THE TIE DYE DRESS:


French Connection £160

Tie Dye is a HUGE trend at the moment, but I know it can leave you wondering whether or not you will look like a hippy. If that is the fear buy something subtle and beautiful like this French Connection dress - being 100% silk, dip dye, floaty and stunning, the last thing people will expect you to do is braid your hair and stop shaving. Although...


THE LACE DRESS:


Lace Dress Coral
Matalan £25
The lace dress has been in for a while and will continue for another season. Perhaps because it is feminine and flattering, perhaps just because we all have a weird desire to wear things that our nan tells us she could make. Either way, they are the thing of the moment. I love colourful lace, such as this coral number from Matalan, but I am also all about the ones with contrasting fabric underneath. Play around with what you can find. If you are a skilled seamstress, or just happen to like a bit of Gok Wan, remove the under layer of your lace dress and wear with long colourful vest tops/dresses in contrasting colours. That will show your Nan...bless her.


THE FLAPPER DRESS:


eu_ss12_fs_wrtw_11
Gucci


River Island £100
The flapper dress is all about flamboyance, luxury and extravagance. Its about hearing the beads click together when you twirl, its about having a boyish figure and its about dancing like you were in 20s Paris. I have shown you here that this is a HOT designer trend at the moment as well...and if like me you can't afford the oh so lovely Gucci version, well River Island will work just as perfectly. Would I like to dance? Merci Monsieur.

THE BRODERIE ANGLAISE/LASER CUT DRESS:


The Kooples 175 Euros

Basically you need to get yourself a dress with tiny holes in it.... If you are a pretty girl next door type, broderie anglaise is perfect for you as it is small dainty patterns made out of holes that have been cut and sewn in fabric. If you are a little more daring try laser cut pieces which can see any shape, size or pattern being cut into most materials. Either way wear something contrasting  underneath if there is the option for such. Dazzle in this trend...it will be a HOLE lot of fun. Oh, stop. I also chose a The Kooples dress because they are a fabulous brand that I have been in love with for a good while now. They are all about gorgeous his and her's tailoring...and my life dream is to become a part of a Kooples Couple. There, I said it. ALSO, BIG NEWS!!! They are opening a new store in Cheltenham where Crabtree and Evelyn used to be. Thank you Kooples, it is like Christmas but with less drunk relatives.... oh wait Pete Doherty is their newest spokesman...


THE HANKY HEM DRESS:


Firetrap £95 (House of Fraser)
Dresses with uneven hems all the way round or cascading hems from front to back are fabulous. If you have shorter thicker legs get the dresses with longer backs and shorter fronts because this will create the longer leg illusion. So chic, I might cry....a cascade of tears. (PS - I heart the print on this Firetrap dress also).


THE FULL SKIRTED DRESS:

Anthropologie £128
The full skirt look works for your retro Americana as seen at Prada and the likes, but also for my all time fav...the 50s housewife; as per this gorge creature above. Feel pretty, girly and feminine in this creation, but dont go all creepy housewife from The Help. Cat-eye sunglasses, some cute retro hair and a wee Chanel quilted bag is all you really need for that guy you've had your eye on to tell you that you are just swell. (PS - I have just been informed that Lauren Conrad has put this dress on her blog as well today - thought I should come back and tell you that I am pretty much the bees knees.)

Dresses that are always in for this season and perhaps forever....floral, maxi, one shoulder, pastel, neon (SUBTLE dont dress like a highlighter) and as always the LBD.


I just want to say that yesterday was a sad day for many in Gloucester as a local rugby player died aged only in his early twenties. I did not know this person, but I know some of his team-mates and a few of his friends. Due to this I just want to say to you all that life is hard, painful and at times you may think it is not worth what you put in, but remember you only get one chance. You may be lucky and live to 100 or, like Dominic fate may have other plans for you. Either way just remember the argument you had with your boyfriend/girlfriend/parents/sibling and understand it was pointless. Tell each person in your life that you love them, everyday if possible, because life is a gift and it is one we all are too quick to take for granted. I appreciate every single one of you taking time to read my blog and for those of you who are family or friends, I love you dearly. For those of you who have just stopped by for a quick read, thank you, I appreciate your kindness and hope there is someone sitting next to you who will tell you they love you too.

Best Wishes,
Becky xxx

Wednesday 2 May 2012

Dress Like Victoria Beckham ....but by spending a lot less cash and eating a lot more burgers.

Hello!

How is everyone?? I took a little break from blogging because working is hard and I was tired when I got home...welcome to the real world right? But I am back and ready to annoy you all again. I had a wonderful birthday filled with friendship and love. I received a camera so I can take pictures of stuff I think is cool. To start with, I bought a few random pieces of clothing and will show you them!!

Top left is a really colourful tribal skirt!! It was from New Look and I believe was about £15. It looks so cute with a white sheer shirt or a champagne coloured sheer shirt tucked in!! Loads of gold jewellery and tan wedges??? Oh, go on then. The maxi skirt is a gorgeous orange and is from none other than my love - Tesco. £12 I think and the quality is wonderful. I wore this with a yellow and white polka dot top and brown ballet flats. Finally the two little things underneath are a black and (although it looks salmon) neon pink boob bandeau!! These are a god send!! I may be a little slow on the uptake, but finally I have arrived at the boob bandeau platform. I LOVE sheer shirts with bras showing underneath...so sexy. BUT, some of us have slightly larger...assets.... than others and a bra on show could be a little terrifying. So instead invest in a couple of these (£2.99 from New Look). They can also be worn under baggy vest tops and things with low armholes. So cute under white sheer shirts though. Just adds that pop of colour needed!!

Also I bought a dress from the H&M Concious Collection. It was a bargain at £14.99 and is made of Lyocell - an eco-friendly manufactured fibre. The collection is really cute so if you havent looked yet...well what are you waiting for?!!!!

I made a completely ridiculous birthday list of things I would never hope to get: Louboutins, Chloe bag, Burberry trench, Louis Vuitton luggage. You know, the staples. It made me think. Am I going to go through life wishing I owned all the designer things I want, get really depressed that I dont have them and spend a substantially amount of money...and shame...eating and crying into a Terry's Chocolate Orange?? NO!!! Well hopefully not. Instead I have been looking up high street copies of all the things I want and dear friends, I will share them with you. Here are my favourites...

Mirror Print Tee In BlackStella McCartney


(Left) Matalan £14 vs (Right) Stella McCartney £955.
Mirror print is so in right now - Stella does the cutest pair of trousers and a top to go with this as well....

Victoria, Victoria Beckham

(L) Asda £8 vs (R) Victoria, Victoria Beckham £950 (Net-A-Porter).
Another great print, with just a slight variation in price...ahem. Bring a whole new meaning to crazy cat lady.


Christian Louboutin
(L) Topshop £28 studded slippers vs (R) Louboutin (Net-A-Porter) £635.
Everyone has studded everything. Dont get left behind as the only one who doesnt go off when walking through the metal detector at the airport.


Image 4 of ASOS Cropped Trousers in Paisley PrintJil Sander

(Top) ASOS £35 vs (Bottom) Jil Sander £1,540
The ASOS trousers HAVE to be mine. I will buy them and I will love them more than anything. Like Kate Moss said - nothing tastes as good as paisley print feels...or something along those lines.


PRINTED DRESSBalalaika floral dress

(Top) Zara £39.99 vs the oh so lovely (Bottom) Mary Katrantzou £1,105
I am her greatest fan and I would give the earth to have a piece of her clothing (literally it costs the earth) BUT you can find a whole host of Mary-a-likes at Zara. So look there and try not to cry too much when you walk past the neighbour you have that grows pretty flowers that remind you of MK's SS12 collection. Sigh. You will be mine, oh yes, you will be mine.


And those are my favs at the moment. Look hard enough and you can always find a good look-alike. Its all about being a ruthless...and penniless (boo) shopper. I will bring you more as and when I discover them.

Some tidbits for today before I go:
- In A/W look out for metal toed heels and pumps a la Chanel as these are an extension of the lady-like trend happening at the moment.
- Also look out for heels with see through sides as Beyonce was pictured wearing. These were in a few years ago and I had a gorge pair from New Look, which of course I gave away thinking they would never come back into fashion again. Alas, even I make mistakes.
- Tulisa was voted FHMs sexiest woman... think of this what you may, but she has taken a lot on the chin recently....
- Preen, Jenny Packham (pretty much 50% of Kate Middleton's wardrobe is by JP) and Roksanda Illincic (Colleen Rooney was seen wearing their 'it' dress of the season to the horse racing - it was hot pink and had massive sleeves) have all either done recently or are about to launch collections for Debenhams. They join the likes of Matthew Williamson who has been there for a good while now. Remember that collections such as these sell out quickly so keep your eyes peeled. They are not as heavily advertised as collaborations with H&M etc, so you have to do your research. Or wait for me to tell you and then buy me a gift as a thank you!!
- Tomorrow is voting day!! Remember to make sure you vote for someone you care about or not at all!! Dont just guess as we could end up with some nut job!! Remember fashion is only as pretty as the prime minister's wife that wears it...

Hope you all have had a good day!
Night xx